Disclaimer: They are not mine, they are NOT mine, they are SO not mine! Sigh.
Dedication: This story is dedicated to Lady T for filling in for me, for putting up with my oddities and for going above and beyond the call of duty. The girl is a saint! ; )
I gasped and my hand flew to my mouth, then, as it dawned on me that he had said it in front of Joseph I cried out, "Thomas!" I gaped, open-mouthed, motioning toward the man standing next to me. "What are you...."
Before I could finish, Thomas had crossed the room to stand in front of me. He was exasperated, angry with me. I had never seen him like this and I was hurt and confused.
"Elizabeth!" he said, taking my hands roughly in his. "I thought that I had made it clear that Joseph is the best and most faithful friend anyone could have -- he is like a brother to me! Of course I have told him everything, he is here to help you and he had to be made aware of everything that has happened. How can he possibly protect you if he does not know what he is protecting you FROM?"
My mind was reeling and I could say nothing for a few moments.
"Thomas, I know that you were convinced that such would not be the case, but have you heard if there is any foul play suspected? Do you foresee ANY possible suspicion in the future that could create a problem for either you or Elizabeth?" Joseph asked.
"It appears, at least for now, as if we have nothing to worry about -- it will be your job to keep abreast of that situation and contact me if, at any point, it becomes a problem for her. I do not suspect that will be the case but, if it does, I will deal with it then. I am entrusting her to you completely, my friend."
Joseph placed a hand on his shoulder and nodded sadly. "I will not disappoint you, Thomas."
My heart was breaking. He was leaving -- he REALLY was going to leave me. Thomas must have sensed my despair for his eyes softened and he spoke comfortingly. "Elizabeth, do you still trust me?" I nodded and he continued, taking one of Joseph's hands and mine and placing them together between his.
His voice trembled as he spoke, the words coming more hoarsely and quietly as he went on and ending barely above a whisper. "I want you to understand how difficult this is for me -- I am leaving the two people I care about most in the world. It is highly probable that I will never see either of you again."
He searched my face and looked deeply into my eyes, huge hot tears rolled down my cheeks as he spoke. "It is a great source of comfort to me to know that I am leaving you together. There is so much each of you has to offer to the other, and I have nothing left to offer either of you except each other."
Joseph groaned and pulled Thomas to him, hugging him roughly. They held each other for a long time, their eyes brimming with tears. Thomas was the first to pull away, and he met Joseph's eyes fiercely. "Take care of her for me," he whispered tremulously. Joseph nodded grimly and Thomas nodded his head in relief.
He brought my hand to his lips, closing his eyes tightly to avoid looking into mine. "Goodbye Elizabeth, I will never forget you," he said bitterly, as he placed my hand in Joseph's. He did not look up to me again, but turned to the door and walked out quickly, mounting his horse and slapping it roughly on the rear as he galloped off.
A sound that I did not recognize escaped my mouth as I slumped toward the floor and was caught by two strong arms. Joseph pulled me tightly against his chest, desperately fighting his own tears as he spoke to me softly, comfortingly while I sobbed broken-heartedly against him.
I have no idea how long we stood there, wrapped in our sadness -- sharing the pain of our terrible loss. I know that Joseph closed up the office and hitched his horse to the back of the cart and drove me home. I assume that I told him how to get there, but I remember nothing of the trip.
The first thing I do remember is him reaching up to me with his comforting arms and helping me down off of the cart. I was too miserable and distraught to do anything else but melt into his arms again and allow him to carry me to the house, up the stairs and to my room.
It amazes me, in retrospect, to realize that I was lost so deep in misery that I accepted his offer of help and allowed him to undress me, down to my chemise, and put me in my bed. His face was so compassionate and so filled with his own pain as he handed me a pillow to hold tightly against my chest, and asked if I wanted him to stay.
I must have let him know that I did not, for he leaned down and kissed me tenderly on the forehead, "I promise you, we will get through this... together." His words were so quiet I could barely hear them, and then he was gone, and I was alone. More alone than I had ever been in my whole life.
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