Human After All
Chapter 5
by
Tyna & Utendi



DISCLAIMER: Marvel owns all the characters. No money was made from this corroboration. Thanks to Utendi for this story idea and her endless patience when I was slow with my chapters. There would be no story if it weren't for her.

NOTE: Anything phrases or sentences bordered by an asterix indicates a character is using internal dialogue. The segment author's name is in parenthesis and begins each segment. Above all else; ENJOY!




(Utendi)

Jean gazed down into Sam's face, watching him toss restlessly as he fought against the torpor of the sedative.

"He needs a higher dosage," she murmured, mournfully, flicking the syringe to clear any air bubbles. She was about to press the sharp needle into Sam's vein, but Hank McCoy halted her motion. He took her wrist gently, guiding it away again with a firm shake of his head.

"No. He needs sleep more than anything. He's already on a very high dosage... it will take effect eventually." Seeing that she understood he took the syringe and released her. He placed it absentmindedly on a surgical tray and moved back towards the steel table where Jubilation Lee had been laid out. "...I already have to tend to one casualty, this evening... I would prefer that it not become two."

Jean had never seen the expression on the doctor's face, drawn, more grave than any over one of his patients... but then, few of them ever expired before they came into his care. Jubilee looked thirteen again, pale as a candle and still dripping onto the table. Hank had cleaned her of as much blood and earth as he could, slowly revealing the damage that the tree branch had done, and all the while shaking his head, baring his teeth against the tragedy that they had been too late to prevent.

Jean shivered, rubbed her arms and turned towards the door, glancing back at him.

"What will we do with her body?"

"I can't do anything, tonight," he sighed and, draping a sheet over her body, watched the fabric settle onto the damp contours of her chest and stomach. "We're all the family she has... whatever arrangements we make will be up to us."

"I think Logan would want to--" She stopped as Hank turned to her, and nodded sadly.

"Logan is not in any frame of mind to make such decisions, at the moment. We'll keep her remains preserved as long as we can, until he's better able to handle the situation. Agreed?"

Softly, she responded, "Agreed."

They shared a quiet nod of farewell before Jean departed altogether from the medbay, circuitously winding her way back to the upper portions of the mansion, in search of her companions. It had not been an easy return from the woods; at the extremity of his grief, Logan had been unable and unwilling to release Jubilee, even to Hank's capable hands.

Only after Jean herself had forced a telepathic calm upon him had they been able to pry the girl from his arms. Hank had assured them later that it had made no real difference; even if he had been at the ready when the tree had fallen, he could have done nothing to save her life.

'Her heart was in pieces', he'd said... those had been his exact words. Ironic that she had left so many hearts in a similar state, in her wake.

There were voices in the rooms up ahead, and the woman stirred from her reverie to focus upon where her feet were taking her. Warm light from the sitting room... the sounds of shifting, the pulse of emotions on the air. Minds she recognized... she'd found them.

Scott was standing by the fireplace when he arrived, his back to the assembly as he stared down into the flames. Scattered about the loveseats and chairs arranged across the parlor floor, those who had gone in search of Logan and Jubilee now contemplated the loss of one of their own.

Ororo kept vigil by one window, gazing at the group as if she had partnered herself with the storm, and shared its guilt in what had occurred. Rogue and Remy shared the couch, but the Cajun was looking much worse for wear, and captured more and more of Rogue's nervous glances. And Logan... the man was nowhere in sight.

Scott came to life as Jean took the doorway, turning his head to regard her from one corner of his visor. "Jean..."

"He's asleep... or close to it. We tried to get more out of him, but... he was just exhausted. We finally decided it would be best to sedate him, and try to talk to him in the morning."

"Any idea what he was talkin' about?" Rogue pressed. "About why he was in pain?"

"No," she shook her head, hating the helplessness of the admission.

"An' petite?" Remy asked.

Silence.

Storm bowed her head, turning to face the window as her arms folded tightly beneath her chest. Jean could only shake her head, palming at her eyes as exhaustion overtook her. Rogue, half dazed, reached out to lay a hand on Gambit's shoulder.

"...C'mon, shug. You're goin' back t'bed."

"Non... Gambit wants to see her. Before they do anything to her..." He lifted his eyes to Jean, not asking, but telling her. She looked pained as she replied.

"Gambit... she looks--"

"Merde--I don' care." He rose unsteadily, and Rogue caught his arm a moment before he shakily regained his balance. Even in the dimness of the foyer Jean could see the feverish glow of his eyes; he was burning up. "...Where they take her?"

When had breathing become so laborious? As if the air itself were lead, Jean drew a deep breath and turned, wearily bidding them to follow.

"Come on. I'll take you both."

*******


The light had been beautiful... more so than anything she'd ever created. She remembered thinking: If I had power like that in my hands, I could change the world.

And then it struck her.

The pain had been exquisite, tearing through her as if piercing through the fabric of her soul. Jubilation had never been more keenly aware of her physical self, nor its delicacy. She had always been tough, but there were some things one just did not overcome. Some scrapes you could not brush off and chalk up as a lesson learned. Some pain was forever.

...Then again...

Air saturated her lungs; she could feel the fluid collected within, and the pain it caused as she sucked in that first new breath. Gagging violently, she scrambled to turn over, exploding in a series of wracking coughs. Half-expecting to find herself bent over the edge of her bed, Jubilation was surprised instead to see only a metal wall, and to catch the curdling aroma of formaldehyde. Everything was dark; the air was cold but dry. Where was she?

"...Wolvie?" she asked aloud, and although she spoke with vehemence, her voice was still weak and crackling. Another cough then she yelled, "LOGAN?"

THUMP, her hand struck the wall, making a sound like metal thunder. Water was dripping into her eyes... as her senses returned, suddenly Jubilee could feel her clothes clinging to her, and the stiff, light weight of the autopsy sheet that had been drawn over her chest. It gave her a sudden, terrifying sense of place.

"LOGAN!" she screamed, and beat in terror at the walls of the drawer.

(Tyna)

Sam sat bolt upright, or at least tried to. He was yanked abruptly back to the padded steel exam table by wide leather straps that fastened his wrists to the sides of the table. For a few moments he lay blinking, his eyes refusing to focus. A metallic thud echoed in his drug-fogged brain. Steadily it got louder, followed by a faint cry for help. Shaking his head violently, he managed to clear his vision and searched the deserted Medlab.

Adjacent to the Medlab was the morgue and it was glowing. Suddenly a white hot metal plate shot past Sam missing him by inches. He tried to warn Jean, Rogue and Remy, now standing in the doorway, but the drugs made it hard to react quickly.

Rogue could have taken the hit, but unfortunately invulnerability was neither Jean's nor Remy's power. Jean had it covered though. On reflex her telekinetic shield popped up with an audible electric-static hum. The plate slammed into the invisible barrier with so much force its shape changed and slid into a liquid lump on the floor. Their confusion must have shown because Sam called out to them. "Jubilee!" That one name suddenly made everything clear, at least, where the metal plate had come from.

Jean disengaged her shield and psionically reached out to Sam. When she brushed his mind to ask for permission to enter she caught glimpses what he had been trying to tell them ever since this mysterious pain started to plague him. There were no longer shockwaves of pain, just the memory of a fatal wound closing; healing that would rival Wolverine's. She saw Sam replay through his rebirth, but images of Jubilee insinuated themselves. Jean finally made the connection and rapidly snapped into her own head.

When her eyes refocused, Remy was leaning heavily against the threshold staring intently at her face. Rogue had thrown his other arm over her shoulders offering any support he would accept.

"Well, don' jus' stand dere, chere, what did y'see?"

"What's thuh mattah sugah? Cat got yer tongue?"

There was no need for Jean to answer. Jubilee staggered into Medlab casting off excess energy caused by the fear of her temporary entrapment. Her clothes were still a mess, patches of mud and blood clinging stubbornly to the tattered material, but the gaping hole in her chest was gone replaced by a long pink scar.

Gambit fainted, dead away, challenging Rogue's balance. Sam had all but sweated out the drugs, his new and improved metabolism taking care of any that remained. He convinced Jean to undo the straps so he could help Jubilee. In her confusion she might detonate the whole lab.

"Jean, this will take too long to explain to her. I need you to psi-link us together so she can see, feel everything I went through to understand."

Without any hesitation Jean expanded her consciousness and called to her teammates' minds. She remembered to draw Rogue in so she could tell Remy later on what exactly was going on. After a brief consideration, she widened the psi-band to include everyone in the mansion. They all had the right to know. One by one, their astral projections appeared as the background faded to shades of dull gray.

Logan was not among them. His psi-shields must be firmly in place to be able to block Jean out. Only with Cerebro's augmentation would she have a chance to locate him but there was no time. Jubilee stood in the middle with Sam arms intertwined, foreheads pressed together, mirroring their physical bodies.

Images appeared in the gray "sky" above them shifting from scene to scene at an alarming rate. Unconsciously, Sam paused at particularly important memories. His awakening and discussions with Gideon, the sadness he felt with the knowledge that he may very well outlive everyone he cares about, the realization and comfort he took in knowing that it is possible to allow people to get close. He may live forever, but what was a life without love?

Jubilee's memories followed and she was helpless to prevent her entire life from being exposed. But, it didn't frighten her like it used to. They were her family, people who gave a damn, people who accepted her no matter what. And now, she needed them more than ever. After every memory that was confusing, an image of Gideon would pop-up, offering answers from portions of his conversations with Sam.

It seemed like they were there for hours. The exchange continued to increase in speed, until only emotions lingered. Acceptance, understanding, fear, and elation swirled around them in a cleansing wind.

Jean broke all contact, rapidly untangling the rest of the team minds and placing them back in control of their mental facilities. Jubilee lifted her head up and glanced about. Her face beamed with an ear to ear smile that warmed Jean down to her toes. Sam recovered enough to help Jubilee to her feet, but couldn't remember when they'd moved to the floor.

"God, I'm a mess," Jubilee exclaimed after examining her clothing. The blood had turned a dull, sickening brown and streaked her fair skin. "I might as well burn this. It's completely trashed," she lamented fingering the ragged edges of her favorite blue body suit. Thankfully her slicker was only dirty. She hated the thought of getting rid of it. Years ago, she'd stolen it from Dazzler when she was skulking about their Australian base. Eventually circumstances forced her emergence from hiding. A man had needed her help. She had almost forgotten. "Where's Logan?"

Rogue threw Remy over her shoulder like a rag doll, making her way to Jubilee's side. Super strength did come in handy every once in a while. More then handy with the profession she'd reluctantly chose. Everyone dreams of being a superhero, not too many can realize it.

"Don't fret none sugah. Y'all just rest now, y'here?" Rogue pulled her in for a quick hug, then left to attend to Remy, muttering something about stubborn polecats.

Beast nearly ran them down in his haste to get to Medlab. He was apologizing eloquently as he backed into the doorway. Without warning he spun around and grabbed Jubilee in a bear hug displaying an uncharacteristic amount of emotion. Then held her at arms' length, her feet dangling a good four feet off the ground.

"Blue!"

"I believe you are a spectacle for aching ocular organs."

"English, fuzzy."

"Translation: sight for sore eyes," Jean cut in brushing laugh tears from her eyes.

More of the X-Men arrived crowding into Medlab, as if they needed to see with their own eyes that she was alive and kicking. They passed Jubilee among them in a frantic series of hugs and kisses on the cheek. The Professor raced in on his aero-chair forcing several members to throw themselves aside or be run over. Jubilee submitted meekly - a first for sure - to his gentle lecture, fully aware that this was how he showed he cared.

"Where's Logan?" she repeated after a quick scan of the sea of faces. The silence that followed along with the exchanging glances made Jubilee uneasy. Patience was not one of her strong suits, but she tried, shifting from foot to foot, hoping he hadn't skipped town.

Finally the Professor chimed in. As the most powerful psi on the premises he was able to sense Logan's presence. "He's still here, my dear, but I cannot determine his exact location. His mind has always been hard to grasp.

Jean humphed in the background and whispered, "Don't I know it."

Professor X shot her a knowing glance and continued. "Why don't you get cleaned up and ready for bed. Your eyes are all but burned holes in your head. He'll turn up sooner or later." He shooed everyone out Medlab, guiding Jubilee toward her room. "The rest of you can choose to ignore me but I think its bed time my "children"."

*******


Logan had returned to the small clearing in the forest where he lost his "life". Several hours into his meditation, Logan felt Jean grasping for his mind. He rose ever psi shield he had, fortifying them with raw anger he had been trying to control. He didn't want to be "helped" and only wanted to be left alone.

The only other time he ever felt this bad was when Mariko died, though this seemed harsher somehow because he never had the chance to love Jubilee like she deserved. Grief choked his throat tight as her smiling face kept flashing behind his closed eyes. Despite the occasional crash of thunder, her laughter rang in his ears. Try as hard as it might, the rain couldn't wash her scent away. Her blood stained his jeans and mixed in with the mud he knelt in.

Tired, he was so tired. For once Logan felt old, the weight of world almost too much to bear. Now he had to deal with Jubilee's funeral. Sighing, he swallowed down the lump in his throat and rose. He gathered a few items from their cave he felt she'd want in the next world and slinked under every proximity alarm to steal into the mansion, into Jubilee's room, unnoticed. No one would dispute his right to stay there.

He almost lost his perfect balance upon the eaves below her window when the light flicked on. Logan dropped down, hugging the tiles of the eaves. Rage sang in every nerve. *I don't flamin' believe it!* he fumed wondering who was invading the sanctity of Jubilee's room.

Sounds of dresser drawers opening and closing with a wooden thump and plastic rings rubbing against metal as the shower curtain as pulled shut floated out the window. *That tears it! Ain't no one is movin' inta this room. They ain't even waiting till she's buried. I'll kill 'em!*



CHAPTERS:   1   2   3   4   5   Epilogue




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